Life On It

One of my favorite albums is Life After Death by TobyMac. I remember listening to TobyMac when I was younger, even going to see him in concert at Wild Adventures. I always thought he was so cool and loved the music. But I don’t think it was until I was older that I really understood exactly what the meaning of these songs were. This album came out in 2022 after his son died. It can be a hard listen. It’s good for grief, challenging yourself, but also enouragement. One of the songs on the album is called, “Life On It”. Check out the chorus:

I’ll put my life on it
Willing to die for it
No matter what they say, if I ever go MIA
They took my life for it
I’ll put my life on it
I’ll put my life on it

I’d rather live for somethin’ than to die for nothin’
I’mma live for somethin’, I’mma live for

I feel like God has been asking me lately if I would really lay my life down for Him. Am I really willing to give up everything in order to serve Him?

A few months ago, a young missionary couple living in Haiti was killed. They lived in a dangerous part of the country and knew what the dangers were. I don’t know exactly what took place that led to their deaths, but I have been impressed with the stories that I have heard. It is important to note that there are many stories swirling around this event and the family has stated that not everything on the news is true. The family even said that they do not know and will never know exactly what happened. But they have said that even though they knew how dangerous this area was, they felt that God was calling them to stay there with their Haitian brothers and sisters, to serve God alongside them. But that isn’t what really called out to me, it was this quote from their missions Facebook page (Missions In Haiti, Inc.), “The whole time Davy kept preaching to the gangs and telling them that God loves them and will forgive them, quoting scriptures and telling them the plan of salvation. They would tell him to shut up and he wouldn’t, so they would hit him. He was told by one staff to please be quiet and just lay there, but Davy said he couldn’t, that these guys needed to hear about the Hope of Jesus, and the plan of salvation. When the second group came with over 100 guys all shooting, Davy was seeking shelter in our house at the other end of the property. The staff and kids in the big house could hear him from the house doing the same thing. Telling the gang guys about the love of God, quoting scriptures, and telling how to be saved and forgiven and have a home in Heaven some day. They said he did that until they killed him.” The entire time that the entire thing was going down, this man chose to preach the gospel. He would not be detered from what God’s call on his (and all of our lives) is.

Sunday, I spoke at my home church First Baptist of Pinetta. While there, I learned that my childhood pastor, Brother Tommy, and his lovely wife, Mrs. Ann, were supposed to be there Sunday night. I have shared before what a big part Bro T played in my journey to where I am now. I have not seen them in several years and was excited for the opportunity. Of course, it was wonderful to hug them and chat with Mrs. Ann some about what it is like to live a life of 24/7 ministry, but I was also excited to hear Brother Tommy bring the message. He shared about a friend who had grown up in Uganda. This man grew up in a time period where anyone opposing the government was persecuted and killed, especially Christians. He had shared that he remembers the special forces coming through his village in the middle of the night and shooting up homes. He remembered his sister and her kids being forced to watch her husband, a pastor, executed. But he also remembers the crowds at church being bigger after each attempt to discourage the Christians.

I have also been a part of a womens bible study group this summer. So far, I have only been able to participate online but I am hoping to be able to be there in person soon. It is an eye-opening, encouraging, challenging (seeing a theme?) Bible study written by a local friend. I have been blessed so far by it. (If you are a woman and interested, let me know!) Last week, one of the passages of scripture we looked at was 1 Peter 4:12-19. If you’re following along with me here, I don’t even have to explain it… you’ll see as you read these verse.

12Dear friends, don’t be surprised when the fiery ordeal  comes among you to test you as if something unusual were happening to you.  13Instead, rejoice as you share in the sufferings of the Messiah,  so that you may also rejoice with great joy at the revelation  of His glory. 14If you are ridiculed for the name of Christ,  you are blessed, because the Spirit  of glory and of God rests on you.  15None of you, however, should suffer as a murderer, a thief, an evildoer, or a meddler.  16But if anyone suffers as a “Christian,” he should not be ashamed but should glorify God in having that name. 17For the time has come for judgment  to begin with God’s household,  and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who disobey the gospel of God?

18And if a righteous person is saved with difficulty,

what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?  

19So those who suffer according to God’s will should, while doing what is good, entrust themselves  to a faithful Creator.

Pulling all of these things together, I really feel like God is asking me that question, are you willing to give your life for Me? And giving my life does not necessarily mean to be a martyr, it means whatever it is that I am holding back, can I give it to Him? We are all holding something back, unwilling to let go. I know I am. But when we let go, that’s when we can fall into the arms of Jesus. When we finally agree to die to self, that is when we truly live. A verse in the song that I mentioned earlier goes like this: “I never thought for a second when I asked You to save me, That I’d ever be steppin’ into the waves that would take me, To the valleys we’ve crawled or the peaks that we’ve run, From the blessings poured out, to me losin’ my son, You’re my way and my truth, I’m a disciple of You, Through the highs and the lows, my heart will always stay true, They could put me in chains, they could lock me away, They would slay me in vain, I will always remain.” I never thought that I would be where I am today. I had to give up control. It was something I clung (still cling sometimes) to. And I had to give it over to God. Allow Him to be in control in my life. Allow myself to know that He had been in control all along. And now I am thankful for that, for Him forcing me to overcome my fears. I pray that I will always remain. I pray that I can truly say I put my life on it. That I am willing to die for it. I pray that I can deny myself, that I can truly say it is no longer me that lives, but Christ in me. That I can follow Pauls example and know that to live is Christ and to die is gain.